[VR] Reaver's Roid

[MOD]

<Rolls carry>

"Uh, who's Zilch? But anyways, glad to get the job. I like working with honorable fellows who are not overly entangled with statutes."

"Um..." MOD contemplates this question as ey runs to Grizzelblak. How does one describe a monster with a literally bottomless stomach? Like philosophically?

"Zilch is like this creature that just eats and eats," M says, "and only eats. And when he's not eating he's thinking off food. I dunno if he is honorable or not. He's more just kinda like the idea of hunger in a furry blue skin. Can a personified state of being have a moral code?"

Ey then thinks about the rest of the Reavers, "The rest of us tho. We totally have a code we live by. You'll figure it out as you go along."

[Quicky]

<rolls carried>

Umm, guess was the monster Ashrak was talking about. Again, he can't be that bad if he's following a Promethian around. He'll be in control no doubt. he rationalizes to himself.

"Ok, then how do you keep him happy? Is there a trick?"

I've heard of pets that always wanted more food, and you get on their good side if you give them a treat. "

"Is there something Zilch likes the most?"

[The Machine]

Perception: 1d100: [62] = 62 /58%
Just in Case: 1d20: [17] = 17 ; 1d100: [74] = 74
Conditions: None

Bert sits at the counter, eating his meal, the first real food he's had in a while, as the rest of the Reavers talk to this new individual. Doc White running off when the radio comes on, only elicits a mild raised eyebrow from the pirate mechanic. A scrap of bread being shoved into his mouth, as Mod begins his rant about Naruni. Bert shakes his head and continues eating through the whole thing. Seems green. I wonder what his specialty is? Bert thinks as he sets his fork down to grab his drink. MOD's rant about Naruni ending causes Bert to look up once more.

"I'm gonna finish my food, then I'll be along." Bert says to MOD following his want to leave. When they leave, Bert continues to eat his meal. A few minutes later when he's done, Bert tosses the few credits he owes on the counter and makes his way back to Grizz. I'm really hoping Zilch listened... If he did, he gets a treat, if not... Bert leaves the thought unfinished as he puts his helmet on and steps into the ship. Bert ignores whatever hub bub is going on with Doc and Zilch and makes his way to the cargo bay. Alright where is the manifest..? Bert thinks as he searches for and finds it. He quickly peruses the list, before taking inventory. If everything is there, Bert begins lugging cases of booze to his quarters.

[Phara Vin]

Perception: 1d100: [22] = 22 / 40% +5% regarding vampires/the undead
JiC d100: 1d100: [37] = 37 ; JiC d20: 1d20: [18] = 18

Vinny shows up to a meeting half-way in progress, watches as Dr. White pops in and leaves just as quickly as Zilch calls in some bug-dude on the radio. She doesn't seem to mind not being acknowledged by the rest present, instead clicking on her radio, "Zilch, you better not be having a good fight without me there! Tell me they went down easy."

With her quota of whining taken care of, Phara looks over Quicky as he's hired. Just some human, she settles on, quickly getting bored of trying somehow analyze his skills by glaring intensely at him.

"Right, so you all done here?" ey asks. "Boss will prolly want us back on the ship to help with cleaning up the mess the Doctor makes cleaning up Zilch's mess." Ey glances at Ash and says without even a hint of doubt, "Bring the new guy with, neh?"

Phara resists the urge to roll her eyes at how little she was needed to be here, given the meeting is wrapped up within a few minutes on her arrival. Instead, she continues her look-over of her shiny new weapon.

"Ok, then how do you keep him happy? Is there a trick?"

Phara laughs as she follows MOD back to the ship with the others. "Zilch? Pretty sure ey told you how pretty well. You feed him. Preferably not with yourself, if you wanna stay alive. Otherwise don't be a dick to him anymore than you'd be to anyone else."

At Bert's insistence at staying, Phara gives the mechanic a half-hearted little wave, gun in hand (thought not particularly pointed any which way). Upon arrival at the Grizzelblack, she will bee-line towards wherever Zilch, Dr. White, and the intruder are, if the situation is still going on.

[Zilch]

((Rolls carried))

She doesn't seem to mind not being acknowledged by the rest present, instead clicking on her radio, "Zilch, you better not be having a good fight without me there! Tell me they went down easy."

"Good fight?" Zilch's voice replies over the comms. It's a deep gravelly monstrous voice, in case the new guy is listening in. At this point Zilch might be standing over the bug man whilst snapping off his large meaty limbs whilst replying. There's a note of disappointment in his tone as he considers Phara's question.

If any tortured screams from the bug man come out over the comms, Zilch ignores him. If he's particularly loud, Zilch admonishes him, "Quiet now! Can't you see I'm having a conversation?"

"No, not really. Those fellows chasing our old ship on their rocket bikes awhile back? Now that was a good fight. Tearing apart that rude little cosmo knight who called me a sock puppet? That was a good fight too." He pauses, contemplating the recent skirmish. "And to be fair, these intruders… they killed one another more than what I did. I mean, one of them ate the other two, and no one even invited me! It was really rude all 'round, more rude than good, I'd say."

"If there's anything I can't stand, it's rude people." Zilch's voice goes on with a thoughtful tone as he looks meaningfully at the bug-man, now without some key limbs. "You'd better be listening, understood?" he says to his victim.

"Rude is the absolute worst. Showing up to someone's home, eating all their friends, and not even offering a single bite. What kind of manners are those? Unnaceptable!" He sighs dramatically. "Makes a monster wonder what the galaxy's coming to."

He then brightens. "But fear not, they've all been dealt with. So anyway, when are you all due back? And, did Ashrak get the cold cuts?!"

[Nurse Ratchet]

Zilch is in the lab room where the silvery goo is located. Once Zilch drags in the bug, the silvery goo starts to get excited. It shimmers and hums. A large eye with a tentacle emerges from the top, but it doesn't venture too close. Instead, it stares quietly.

Zilch looms over the writhing roach, his powerful arms lifting the battered creature. He growls, a deep, menacing sound. "You made a mistake dining here. And not inviting me!" His googly eyes narrow, a flicker of genuine indignation crossing his monstrous features. "That's just rude, you know. You don't show up unannounced to one's home without bringing a meal, or at least a bottle of something special. Or even better a box of cookies! I mean, that's just basic manners!" He shakes the roach slightly, a low rumble of annoyance in his chest. "Now, tell me. Who sent you?"

He listens to whatever the bug man says with an increasingly hungry gaze. "Well, I suppose you DID bring something after all," he says, with an evil grin. With supernatural strength, Zilch snaps off any remaining meaty parrying limbs that might pose a threat, and also look like a decent meal!

The middle left segmented limb snaps off like a boiled crab claw. The chitlin is very dense and hard, but tactical application of torque to the joins proved to forthcoming. The dying crustacean wails in pain, but then the scream turns to laughter.

"Yes. You see, I wanted to eat them. Because they've decided to eat our young. And not even out of necessity! They lure our babies with their sweet sounding... *wheeze* lullabies... And they harvest them to make mind candy for others! It doesn't even taste good!"

A new thought sparks in his monstrous mind. He turns his head slightly, speaking directly to the ship. "Griz, are you hungry?" he asks, almost casually. "I haven't tossed anyone into your vat of silvery fun lately. Might be a good snack for you."

He begins dragging the insectoid monster across the lab floor towards the shimmering pool of nanites. As they move, Zilch leans down, his voice a low dangerous tone. "You've got about a minute to tell a story worth listening to, little bug. Who. Sent. You?"

Unless Zilch is really amazed by what the bug man has to say, he tosses him into the naninte solution for Grizz to digest. It's not often one gets to dine on insectoid vermin, Grizz is due a special treat!

"Who sent us? My cohorts and I are following these softies around! We have no idea how they are luring our young and then sending them to their demise in those -high-pitched-moan- machines! These two were going to steal so they can barter for their mind candy! We _have_ _to_ stop them!"

The giant roach lets out a loud sigh...

Just as the scene continues, Dr. White emerges in the dark corridor. A towering giant of white, the roach lets out a terrible gasp as it recognizes Dr. White.

"TIME MASTERS. You are in league with the time masters?"

Trying to scurry to the wall, it pushed back with its remaining hind legs. It doesn't shake, but the sight of the promethean scares the wits out of this hardy space insect.

At this point Phara walks in with full space marine regalia, gun in hand.

"Oh what have I done..."

Surveying the two corpses, Phara Vin and Dr. White notices that they are in work clothes. There are patches on these jump suits sewed at various places, indicating name, department and what vessel the crew once belonged to.

The roach's skin suit is severely punctured and the clothes above the chest area have been shredded. It's difficult to make out what its patches use to say.

"No, not really. Those fellows chasing our old ship on their rocket bikes awhile back? Now that was a good fight. Tearing apart that rude little cosmo knight who called me a sock puppet? That was a good fight too." He pauses, contemplating the recent skirmish. "And to be fair, these intruders… they killed one another more than what I did. I mean, one of them ate the other two, and no one even invited me! It was really rude all 'round, more rude than good, I'd say."

"If there's anything I can't stand, it's rude people." Zilch's voice goes on with a thoughtful tone as he looks meaningfully at the bug-man, now without some key limbs. "You'd better be listening, understood?" he says to his victim.

"I feel the vibrations of your tenor... just fine..."

"Rude is the absolute worst. Showing up to someone's home, eating all their friends, and not even offering a single bite. What kind of manners are those? Unnacceptable!" He sighs dramatically. "Makes a monster wonder what the galaxy's coming to."

He then brightens. "But fear not, they've all been dealt with. So anyway, when are you all due back? And, did Ashrak get the cold cuts?!"

"Yes... I'll no longer scurry in the dark. No more singing to the sun or moon... no more holding my beloveds, with my six legs... our hairs intertwining..."

Turning its head, it meets the gaze of the eyeball.

(Ashrak, Quicky and MOD arrive here.)

"Oh dear. That's the silver? Have you any idea what you have invited to share a nest? YOUR SHIP'S MOTHER IS A DESTROYER OF WORLDS AND THIS "SILVER SLURRY" IS ITS SWORN ENEMY!"

Cackling in morbid glee, it is now hysterical "They are feeding that? And her? What will these softies wrought now? -wheeze- -hiss- -wheee- -hiss-"

Grizzelback suddenly pipes up over the radio.

Suddenly, what's left of the roach levitates quickly and is sent hurtling to the ceiling. It bounces off, only to be sent hurtling back to the floor. If Zilch was still holding onto a limb, it is snapped off.

(Bert walks in here)

In a cold, eerie tone that nobody on the ship has ever heard before, she says over the speakers: "Shut up. Before I will rip your mind to pieces. Speak of me and mine again and I will feed on your young. You will watch. Then when I am done, the mechnites will have what's left."

Addressing Zilch, Grizzelback says: "Zilch, please extract the location of this loathsome creatures nest. I think you will find the answers we need... Hold on."

Suddenly, the roach screams in fright and pain in a pitch and volume that can only be described as blood curdling. It's abdomen expands and contracts rapidly, as if gasping for air.

"There there, she should be ready to talk now."

At this point, the crew has gathered back to watch what has transpired, with Bert last to join.

[Zilch]

JIC: 1d20: [3] = 3 , 1d100: [28] = 28
Perception: 65% (77% in darkness) / 1d100: [93] = 93 (FAIL)

Conditions:

Range: 1800 feet. Alerts to the presence of powerful life forms who are more than human, such as supernatural creatures, other super beings (including mutants and aliens), Major and Master Psychics, and those imbued with magic. It cannot identify or pinpoint the location of the superhuman life forms but will let the character know they are within his sensing range. Life Sense also warns the character when he is severely injured and his own life is in danger of slipping away. This occurs when the character is down to 20% of his M.D.C. or less, as well as when he has just eaten or been injected with lethal poison/venom. Furthermore, the character can sense when others within range are hurt and dying. In the latter case, the superhuman can actually track the sensation to the injured, dying individual (if a good guy, it is to help find and rescue the person, if a bad guy, it may be to gloat or finish the poor soul off).

,

The character's stomach into a bottomless pit, capable of eating nearly anything and his teeth and jaws are capable of chewing steel bars. The stomach of this person transforms 95% of everything eaten into pure energy, meaning that no mater how much he eats, it is digested or harmlessly dispersed without him getting fat or too full. The character can eat even inorganic, non-foods, like stone, metal, glass, rubber or plastic.

Zilch's monstrous mind grapples with the sudden influx of information, a cacophony of cockroach concepts that he can't quite consume.

Just as the scene continues, Dr. White emerges in the dark corridor. A towering giant of white, the roach lets out a terrible gasp as it recognizes Dr. White.

"TIME MASTERS. You are in league with the time masters?"

Trying to scurry to the wall, it pushed back with its remaining hind legs. It doesn't shake, but the sight of the promethean scares the wits out of this hardy space insect.

The monster won't allow the bug man to scurry anyplace if Zilch can prevent it. But he turns his googly eyes to Dr. White as he enters, and greets him with a perplexed look in his googly eyes. "Oh hello doc," he begins cheerfully, "just trying to get some answers from our intruder. In a low voice, heavy with confusion, he adds, "what in the void is this bug man? What are its young? And what's mind candy? Sounds delicious!"

Zilch will repeat the rantings of the prisoner to bring Dr White up to speed.

At this point Phara walks in with full space marine regalia, gun in hand.

"Oh what have I done..."

Surveying the two corpses, Phara Vin and Dr. White notices that they are in work clothes. There are patches on these jump suits sewed at various places, indicating name, department and what vessel the crew once belonged to.

The roach's skin suit is severely punctured and the clothes above the chest area have been shredded. It's difficult to make out what its patches use to say.

"Welcome back Phara!" Zilch says cheerfully, in spite of holding down the struggling prisoner who is desperate to escape. "There were three folk who came here uninvited. Then this one," he gives the bug man a painful squeeze, "plopped out of a human skin suit disguise, and ate the other two. So I've been explaining to him why he should have better manners."

"Yes... I'll no longer scurry in the dark. No more singing to the sun or moon... no more holding my beloveds, with my six legs... our hairs intertwining..."

Turning its head, it meets the gaze of the eyeball.

(Ashrak, Quicky and MOD arrive here.)

Zilch ignores the whining bleatings of the cosmic cockroach, focusing instead on the latest arrivals. "Hello you two, where's Bert? That guy doesn't look like Bert," Zilch eyeballs the newcomer suspiciously with monstrous hungry eyes, though his large shaggy hands do not release the prisoner. Then his eyes widen in surprise and understanding. "Oh! How thoughtful, you've brought me a snack! That's great, I'm starving!" Zilch's eyes narrow as he looks Quicky up and down with an appraising look. "Is he edible ... or vegetable?"

Quicky will see that Zilch is a seven foot tall shaggy blue beast that looks enormously powerful. Though in contrast when he speaks, he sounds quite affable and intelligent, though one can't help but notice his rows of sharp pointy teeth and the casual way in which he seems to normalise brutality.

Zilch horror factor: 16

Grizzelback suddenly pipes up over the radio.

Suddenly, what's left of the roach levitates quickly and is sent hurtling to the ceiling. It bounces off, only to be sent hurtling back to the floor. If Zilch was still holding onto a limb, it is snapped off.

(Bert walks in here)

Well there he is! I was wondering where he got to.

"Bert!" Zilch looks genuinely pleased to see his oldest friend. I've known Bert for... what.. days now? Weeks? I've never had anyone around that long before.

In a cold, eerie tone that nobody on the ship has ever heard before, she says over the speakers: "Shut up. Before I will rip your mind to pieces. Speak of me and mine again and I will feed on your young. You will watch. Then when I am done, the mechnites will have what's left."

Addressing Zilch, Grizzelback says: "Zilch, please extract the location of this loathsome creatures nest. I think you will find the answers we need... Hold on."

Zilch thinks. Griz never asks for anything. If Griz wants it, Griz gets it. He got me a flan machine. He wants anything he gets it.

Suddenly, the roach screams in fright and pain in a pitch and volume that can only be described as blood curdling. It's abdomen expands and contracts rapidly, as if gasping for air.

"There there, she should be ready to talk now."

At this point, the crew has gathered back to watch what has transpired, with Bert last to join.

Meanwhile, as Griz's request reaches him to question the battered insectoid, Zilch tightens his grip. He growls hungrily.

"Listen here, bug," Zilch snarls, his voice laced with menace, "My friend wants answers. And what my friend wants, my friend gets. Where is this nest of treats?"

He looks at Ashrak, "He's got the answers in his head somewhere. Should pull it open? Will that help?" His googly eyes swivel to the bug man, firmly in his grasp, "You might as well speak up you know."

Invoke Trust/Intimidate 29%: 1d100: [26] = 26 (SUCCESS)

If there is any one impression Quicky might get of Zilch in this exchange, it is this: the shaggy blue monster would end Quicky's life as casually as one might take a stroll in the sunshine. Yet, this terrifying indifference doesn't extend to the other Reavers, and he seems particularly fond of Bert and the disembodied voice of Griz coming over the comms.

[The Machine]

Perception: 1d100: [36] = 36 /58%
Just in Case: 1d20: [12] = 12 ; 1d100: [93] = 93
Conditions: None

Another thing going on with the ship... at this rate we're never gonna get anything done. Bert thinks as he continues to move his booze to his room. Oh this is gonna taste sweet once I'm done. Bert thinks as he sets a case of whiskey onto the deck in his quarters.

"Bert!"

"Hi Zilch, having fun? Try not to make too much of a mess with whomever you're playing with." Bert says as he grabs the last of his stock and makes for his quarters once more. Once done, Bert grabs a bottle of whiskey and makes his way to the engineering station., cracking the bottle open, Bert takes a long pull. This'll shut my brain up for a bit. Bert thinks as he starts pre-flight checks. Are these really necessary, it's not like we really fly the ship, she just flies herself, with little to no guidance? Bert thinks as he does what he was trained to do.

Pilot: Spacecraft General 1d100: [79] = 79 /82% Success (Pre-Flight Check)
Sensory Equipment 1d100: [22] = 22 /73% Success (Pre-Flight Check)

Bert eyes the stations readouts and nods. "Everything green... good." Bert says to himself. "All set for take off Captain" Bert says over the team radio.

[Quicky]

Perception: 1d100: [79] = 79
JIC: 1d20: [8] = 8 1d100: [30] = 30

Quicky enters with Ashrak and MOD engaging in small talk about quarters and rations while on board the ship.

Then he sees big blue. Save vs. horror factor: 1d20+1: [10]+1 = 11

"Gah!"
What the hell is that thing?!? and with a loud crack he streaks at high speed back out of the room. Then he realizes it's supposed to be there and he comes back in fairly sheepishly.

To Ashrak he says "That must be Zilch. Ok, I think I know what you were talking about at the pub now. Also, who's that on the comm?" while kind of cowering behind him.

You better calm down or they'll fire you for being gutless. It can't be that bad or the Promethian wouldn't permit it to be around. Just have a bit of faith. What's with the big torn up bug anyway. Best to just wait and find out.

[Dr. White]

JIC: 1d20: [4] = 4 , 1d100: [21] = 21
PER: 1d100: [66] = 66 vs. 78%

White runs in at full tilt, and comes to a halt at the most unexpected scene before him. Not least being called a time master. He blinks furiously for several seconds, then shakes his head ”No, I never had much of a penchant for magic. So unscientific. Messy. Blech! Now UWW techno-wizardry, that’s a fascinating subject! But you can just call me Doctor White. MD. Not much in the way of time mastery. What’s going on here, anyway?” White listens to Zilch’s account with growing admiration, glancing repeatedly between the giant roach, his crewmate, and the skin suit remains on the floor. What an innovative approach! I wonder how they prevented decomposition? White makes as if to peer closer at the suit, for study, when Grizzelback pipes up again over comms, only not quite sounding like herself. Oh my, now that doesn’t sound good. So much we don’t know about our girl the ship! What’s that? A nest?!? Ooooooo! White’s mental squeal briefly makes an auditory appearance as he is clearly excited over the prospect of a nest of giant roaches. ”Ooooo! And they eat people? Fascinating! Let’s go watch!” He peers forward at the roach after Grizzelback hits him mentally, and looks both eager and hungry. ”Now why don’t you be a good lil’ fella and tell us where this is. And maybe just what you meant with all that other stuff you were ranting about with our good friend Grizzelback.”

[MOD]

Perception (33%) 1d100<33: [9*] = 1
JiC 1d20: [13] = 13 / 1d100: [19] = 19

Stuff
Physical shell: Marriot Oberton Damon (the Mod)

While MOD has spent a lot of eir career as a Void Reaver rushing back to the ship, this time is different. First usually the Reavers are fleeing to the ship to get away from whatever trouble they've gotten themselves into; this time the trouble is on the ship. I thought we'd moved beyond having a ship that was perpetually on the verge of imploding. And then there's the seemingly normal (though that is an incredibly relative term here) human that has just provisionally signed up to join the team. He was referenced by a contract of Ashrak's; they interviewed him. 'provisionally' hired. It was all professional-adjacent. Of course things had to set on fire (literally, maybe; we'll see) just when we start acting responsible.

Ey follows the sounds of the horror - the shrieks, some irregular skittering, a wet crunch like the sound of cracking a perfectly boiled lobster - to the lab. The scene inside does not reassure MOD in the least. Body parts are strewn across the lab, bodily fluids are on the walls and ceiling. It's even more chaotic than when the Doctor and Zilch were making scrambled eggs and Oracle brains. M's shoulder slump as ey sighs.

"Oh dear. That's the silver? Have you any idea what you have invited to share a nest? YOUR SHIP'S MOTHER IS A DESTROYER OF WORLDS AND THIS "SILVER SLURRY" IS ITS SWORN ENEMY!"

"Da fux?" MOD glances at Zilch and Doctor White. "What the fux are you two cooking now? And why does more of it end up splattered on the lab than in your," ey thrusts eir finger repeatedly at Zilch, "stomach?!?!"

"They are feeding that? And her? What will these softies wrought now? -wheeze- -hiss- -wheee- -hiss-"

"Shut up. Before I will rip your mind to pieces. Speak of me and mine again and I will feed on your young. You will watch. Then when I am done, the mechnites will have what's left."

M watches Bert just slink to his quarters not wanting to engage with the chaos. Smart man. There's a reason why he's the moral compass of the team. Following suit, ey raises eir hands in the eir. "Fux it," ey says. "I don't need to fuxing deal with all of this. Grizz, let me know when they're all done and then we can go hunt some drug dealers. Sound good? Great."

"That must be Zilch. Ok, I think I know what you were talking about at the pub now. Also, who's that on the comm?"

"That's Grizzelblak, the ship," MOD explains. "She's sentient. And good people. Which is more than I can say for Zilch at the moment. He's usually fine. But if you're gonna feed him, but the food on the floor and then take three steps back or you'll end up like those two over there. Speaking of which, Grizz..."

MOD doesn't have the chance to finish that sentence because Grizzelblak is busy talking to Zilch about how to interrogate the bug.

"Zilch, please extract the location of this loathsome creatures nest. I think you will find the answers we need... Hold on."

"Listen here, bug. My friend wants answers. And what my friend wants, my friend gets. Where is this nest of treats?"

M perks up at this banter. Clearly there's something else going on. "Zilch, I thought you were supposed to ask before you eat sentient beings," ey says turning around. "So why don't you tell me why are you playing with your food?"

[Quicky]

Quicky keeps in the background and observes all the interaction.

”Ooooo! And they eat people? Fascinating! Let’s go watch!”

Ok, someone broke their Promethian. I didn't think you could break a Promethian.

"That's Grizzelblak, the ship," MOD explains. "She's sentient. And good people. Which is more than I can say for Zilch at the moment. He's usually fine. But if you're gonna feed him, but the food on the floor and then take three steps back or you'll end up like those two over there. Speaking of which, Grizz..."

"Roger, feed with care. Got it. he says while staying well behind MOD.

What the hell have I gotten myself into? Just remember, you need the money. You need the money.

[Zilch]

((Rolls carried))

"Zilch, please extract the location of this loathsome creatures nest. I think you will find the answers we need... Hold on."

"Listen here, bug. My friend wants answers. And what my friend wants, my friend gets. Where is this nest of treats?"

M perks up at this banter. Clearly there's something else going on. "Zilch, I thought you were supposed to ask before you eat sentient beings," ey says turning around. "So why don't you tell me why are you playing with your food?"

Zilch pauses, the writhing bug-man still clutched in his powerful grasp. He tilts his head, his googly eyes narrowing in thought. "I don't recall any such rule about eating sentient beings," he looks doubtful. "And even if there was such a rule, which there isn't, it certainly doesn't include annoying people. Or vegetarians, which, honestly, is as close as you can get to being grass-fed. Or people who forget to bring home the salami after a shopping trip!" He looks pointedly at Ashrak, a clear accusation in his gaze. "Ashrak, where are my goodies?"

He turns back to MOD, launching into his explanation. "ANYWAY... Grizz spotted these three sneaking their way into the ship and heading for engineering. I was going to simply devour them for their cheek, but Grizz sensed something off about one of them and suggested I be careful. Careful?" He snorts. "What a novel idea."

Zilch gestures vaguely with the bug-man still in his hand. "Anyway, as these two eaten ones were looking for a light switch, this delicious-looking lobster man, who looked quite human at the time, has two antennae pop out from his forehead. Then these large, juicy-looking claws erupt out of his sides, you know, the ones I tore off and are on the floor there and... ahh there!" He points with a free digit to the discarded limbs. "And smaller feelers shoot out from the abdomen. So when victim number one turns around to ask this fellow to help, he gets impaled by Lobster Man's claws. Victim Two gets killed just as quickly, and Lobster Man eats them both. AND HE DIDN'T INVITE ME! How rude! Very rude indeed."

He shakes the bug-man again for emphasis. "And so, I tenderized him a bit, tore off the offending big claws, and dragged him here. We were just going to find out what's his deal when you all came scurrying back, hopefully with some salami or a leg of ham or something useful!"

White’s mental squeal briefly makes an auditory appearance as he is clearly excited over the prospect of a nest of giant roaches. ”Ooooo! And they eat people? Fascinating! Let’s go watch!” He peers forward at the roach after Grizzelback hits him mentally, and looks both eager and hungry. ”Now why don’t you be a good lil’ fella and tell us where this is. And maybe just what you meant with all that other stuff you were ranting about with our good friend Grizzelback.”

"Oh, he'll tell us, alright," Zilch growls, his googly eyes gleaming. He gives the roach a firm, almost tender squeeze. "If you value your remaining bits, I suggest you start spilling everything you know about yourself, your 'young,' and all that 'mind candy' nonsense. Chop, chop."

[MOD]

<Rolls carry>

"I don't recall any such rule about eating sentient beings. And even if there was such a rule, which there isn't, it certainly doesn't include annoying people. Or vegetarians, which, honestly, is as close as you can get to being grass-fed. Or people who forget to bring home the salami after a shopping trip!"

"Look," MOD starts, "I'm not saying you're prohibited from eating people. (And it's been useful in the past for sure.) But we-"

"Ashrak, where are my goodies?"

MOD tries to reassert control over the conversation after Ashrak provides some reason for not having snacks, "Anyway, it's just that we want to have some say before you-"

""ANYWAY... Grizz spotted these three sneaking their way into the ship and heading for engineering. I was going to simply devour them for their cheek, but Grizz sensed something off about one of them and suggested I be careful. Careful? What a novel idea."

"Ok... that seems reasonable. Abnormally reasonable, but go on."

"Anyway, as these two eaten ones were looking for a light switch, this delicious-looking lobster man, who looked quite human at the time, has two antennae pop out from his forehead. Then these large, juicy-looking claws erupt out of his sides, you know, the ones I tore off and are on the floor there and... ahh there!"

"Fuxing hells," MOD mutters. "You're saying that one of the stowaways sprouted extra limbs? Do corporeals normally do that?

"And smaller feelers shoot out from the abdomen. So when victim number one turns around to ask this fellow to help, he gets impaled by Lobster Man's claws. Victim Two gets killed just as quickly, and Lobster Man eats them both. AND HE DIDN'T INVITE ME! How rude! Very rude indeed."

MOD is completely at a loss for what to say, so ey just goes along with Zilch, "Yeah, that is rude. Ship rule, everyone should offer you food." Ey glances at Quicky and gives him a nod as if to say 'don't worry, it's usually not this crazy.'

"And so, I tenderized him a bit, tore off the offending big claws, and dragged him here. We were just going to find out what's his deal when you all came scurrying back, hopefully with some salami or a leg of ham or something useful!"

It's a lot, and MOD clears eir throat to give emself time to take it all in. Srsly? Three randos show up to play a lively round of Interzone? Fuxing hells! Ey presses eir sunglasses up the bridge of eir nose. "So, M says, "It sounds like you just caught some kind of serial killer." The wheels are turning in M's deceiptful mind. "Yeah, do as Grizz says. Keep the bug alive and get more info about him. I'm gonna call Ortiz and see if we can get a bounty on Samsa over here."

Ey looks over the corpses, and reads the name tags. Might be useful for reporting what happened to Ortiz. Ey then heads to the bridge and opens up the radio. "Hey Ortiz, I hate to bug (pun!) you without having results on our current job," ey starts as ey pulls up the dossier that Ortiz gave M on the drug dealers, "but funny thing happened. We stumbled on a serial killer a couple of his vic-" It's at this moment that ey sees the names of the 'victims' in Ortiz's file. Well, fux me. -tory. We stumbled into a victory for the cause and killed two of the dealers you were looking for and found a third contact that is providing us with credible information. If you wire us the creds, we can leve you the corpses right here and now or dispose of them for you."

[Phara Vin]

Perception: 1d100: [79] = 79 / 40% +5% regarding vampires/the undead
JiC d100: 1d100: [41] = 41 ; JiC d20: 1d20: [6] = 6

Phara Vin comes in to see the situation, surveying it with a cool gaze, her expressionless helmet doing little to convey her boredom at missing a fight, however not-good it was. Just one bug thing? There were more things to shoot at when that damned pod dumped me out in the middle of the 'Roid. She feels the urge to kick something which has long been scrapped and fed to Zilch.

"Welcome back Phara!" Zilch says cheerfully, in spite of holding down the struggling prisoner who is desperate to escape. "There were three folk who came here uninvited. Then this one," he gives the bug man a painful squeeze, "plopped out of a human skin suit disguise, and ate the other two. So I've been explaining to him why he should have better manners."

"They should've saved you a bite," Phara says, chuckling, settling her rifles against her shoulders. At Grizz's outburst and acting against character, Phara tilts her head some, muttering "Struck a nerve there, huh?" Her frown deepens at the thought of something upsetting her friend-in-crime.

Phara keeps her eye on the prisoner as MOD and Zilch converse, their talk unimportant to her, the former Warlock Marine not paying attention to things as usual. Transforming bug, huh? Least that's a little cool to fight. Would've been nice to test out my new rifle on them, though. With a shrug, she moves past her mild irritation and almost settles into her normal boredom when MOD says something that catches her ear.

"Yeah, that is rude. Ship rule, everyone should offer you food."

"Thought that was already a rule, boss, on account of Zilch eating an uppity Cosmo Knight that one time or something." She pulls out one of her clips of 7.62mm that she purchased, and hops it once in her hand. "Once this is dealt with, this is yours, Zilch. Not much, but it's vintage shit." She grins widely at the monster.